Thursday, February 10, 2011

1997: Bye Fife!

Today brings the news that not only will Hosni Mubarak relinquish power, but that creepy sociopath Jon Kyl is giving up his Senate seat. So I rummaged through the archives to go back the last time Arizona lost a statesman of his stature:

So, now, let's just chat a bit about the recent demise of our fairhaired governor, J. Fife Symington III. I couldn't ask for a better fourth anniversary present than for us to finally be rid of this tan blond despot. He exemplifies all the worst qualities of his political party: the shameless pandering to the wealthy and to corporate power, the willingness to bend over backwards to help polluters, developers and other parasites, and the supreme indifference to the health, education and welfare of a majority of the citizenry. Good riddance, indeed.

Fife's successor, Governor Hull, may not be much of an improvement in substance, though doubtless she will be in style. At the very least, Fife's wrongheaded school funding plans seem headed for yet another revision. Maybe someday they'll get it right.

Ms. Hull was recently quoted as saying that the trevails of Fife and of former governor Evan Mecham should not reflect badly on the people of Arizona. Well, excuse me, but of course they should! A majority of the voters of this state voted these yutzes into office, and if that doesn't reflect badly on them, then I don't know what will. Maybe we can find an even more surreal candidate in next year's election and go three for three, huh?

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