Thursday, November 8, 2012

Thanks, Republicans!

I want to take a moment to thank the Republican party for working so hard to make themselves unelectable.

It helped that the last GOP president crashed the world economy and trashed our foreign policy, but they didn’t stop there. They managed to alienate key demographics: Latinos, by blocking immigration reform; young people, by promoting retrograde social policies; women, by blurting outrageous comments on rape and contraception; and seniors, by plotting to voucherize Medicare.

Their media pundits, with their relentless focus on Rev. Wright, birth certificates and Benghazi, made it clear to undecided voters that Republicans had no meaningful solutions to discuss.

And even though the Supreme Court allowed a torrent of corporate cash to sweep the 2010 midterms and gerrymander the House, Republicans trashed their own brand by blocking jobs bills, focusing instead on banning abortion and repealing new heath care benefits for millions of Americans.

And don't even get me started on the presidential candidate; he was the gift that kept on giving - not that they had anyone better to choose from.

Thanks, Republicans, for helping to re-elect Obama, institutionalize Obamacare, and lock down the Senate! We couldn’t have done it without you!

And PS: Even though you may have nailed down the Speaker's gavel for a while, I think we can count on you to overplay your hand again. Hey, don't ever change!

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